Drama Triangle

Communication is part of our everyday basic function. We need to interact with each other, we crave it. Have you ever seen on Sims, when your Sim does not communicate with another Sim , after a while your Sim goes mad- imagines a giant bunny and communicates with him- I digress...
Drama is more part of girls life then in any boys it seems...
I found a very interesting look at the drama triangle-When we communicate with certain people, there are sometimes games involved. A game, its a repetitive, sometimes destructive, but always predictable exchange between 2/ more people. The "Why don't you... yes but" game- example below...

Alice- I'm so bored
Jane- Why don't you start a new hobby
Alice- Starting a new hobbies cost money
Jane - OK,why don't you visit a friend
Alice- They all live so far away- what a mish!
Jane- OK how about doing a pamper night- painting your nails, facial and body scrub
Alice-Ya but I don't have nice nail polish colours
Jane- Why don't you write at least 1 reason why we are still friends!

So you get the point, Alice is presenting a problem, yet is not willing to take any solutions and Jane knows Alice will not take any of her suggestions,yet she keeps answering with new options. This sort of conversation will happen more than once as it somehow fulfils a psychological need in both of them. Alice feels helpless and wants to feel this way, while Jane wants to feel compassionate.
By definition the Drama triangle is a model of dysfunctional social interaction between the three roles, the Victim, the Saviour and the Aggressor.

Victims:  believe they are at the mercy of forces beyond their control. They often don't take responsibility of their own actions and don't think they have the ability to change themselves or their situation. Typical characteristics are complaining, incompetence and helplessness. A typical statement from a victim would be "I cant do anything right, no matter what I do. Nothing seems to work"

 Saviours: see themselves as doing more than their share to help out others. They often seek out victims trying to offer them advice or solutions while neglecting their own problems. Typical characteristics :hidden anger, resentment, tiredness and tactical use of guilt. They seem to be the most positive of the 3, but is their help genuine? You would hear them say " I am always here for you helping you, but I cant, I'm tired".

Aggressor: This guy would typically be seen blaming the victim and criticise the enabling behaviour of the saviour without providing guidance/ assistance or a solution to the underlying problem. They can be typically unpleasant and good at finding fault. They often feel inadequate underneath. They typically criticise with threats, can be loud or quiet.

Note that any one person can be more than one of the above. Players can switch roles during the game. While a healthy person can play either one of these roles a  pathological role-player will avoid leaving the comfortable and familiar environment f the game. Often if there is no situation this person will create one, and so the drama triangle of destruction will continue on its war path to kill peoples days/ moods and social naturalism....
The only way to "escape" this drama triangle is to conduct yourself as an"adult" and not participate in the drama.

X

Masks

Love this too much x

Girl vs Boy

X

Puppy Love

This is Hugo....

He is my new lil terror in my life...

He has the most beautiful eyes...

And a very powerful bite for a 8week old.

Now I wait for his bark...

X

Chistmas Cheer

A Christmas Poem

I made myself a snowball,
as perfect as can be

I thought I'd keep it as a pet,
and let it sleep with me

I made it some pajamas,
and a pillow for its head

then last night it ran away,
but first it wet the bed!!!

 Christmas cookies are a wonderful gift, making and decorating can be a great activate to do with family.

Another great thing is most cookie recipes for the cookie dough can be frozen, to bake and decorate at a later stage.

A simple Shortbread cookie recipe made with butter, powdered sugar and flour.

Ingredients:

1 cup unsalted butter, room temp.

1/2 cup powdered sugar

2 1/2 to 3 cups all purpose flour

1 teaspoon vanilla extract

pinch of salt

Prep:

Mix together the flour and salt in a bowl and set aside. cream together the butter, vanilla and sugar until light and fluffy. Add the flour and salt mixture, a small amount at a time, kneading into cream mixture with your hands until you have a stiff dough which can be rolled. Do not over work the dough.

Turn dough onto floured surface and pat or roll out to 1/4' thickness. Cut into shape you desire and place on an ungreased cookie sheet. Bake at 325' for approx 15min or until Golden brown. Cool and decorate. Store in an airtight container.

Makes approx 3 dozen.

Gift suggestion below.

Beautiful Candy Canes

For the advanced .

Tee hee x

Would love...

I would love to learn to play piano...

X

Set your Soul Free

For me your Soul is that warm you feel inside even when the sun is not shining, a light that shines from within outwards and even that heaviness you feel, drained, anxious, un-inspired. I usually feel this most on a Sunday or Monday (just me?) Today I was searching a "soul cleansing" and I came across this 21 day soul cleansing program. Which I am going to do, and i will share with you the process if you feel this is something that would help you...

DAY 1
So how do you know if you need a lil soul cleansing....
The past plays probably the 1st piece in this whole journey. All your desires lie dormant within your soul- in order to obtain what these are we need to get rid of doubt, numbness, distraction, negative thinking. A higher part of you longs for growth vs the lower part that clings to what you are familiar with- even though this might cause pain or discomfort. The fact that you are looking for something more is the sign you are looking for according to Debbie Ford.

The unhappiness that sits inside, that is your frustration, discontent and anxiety are now pushing you for release-this requires you to be 100% truthful with yourself about The Present condition in your life, you will just be binding yourself to the past and closing the door to the future and upper self growth. This truthful realisation will allow you to open up to happiness, the courage to express your ideas and take risks.

So the 1st thing you do is- to bring forth your souls greatest desires. You pick 1 goal to achieve in your outer world and 1 goal to achieve in your inner world which you wish to achieve in the next 21 days...

Cleansing Ritual, you write down the area's of your life that require the most amount of attention right now. Ho will achieving your goals change your life? How will it affect the people around you? By achieving that part of your life what will that make room for?

Your Outer Goal: The action you take today that will move you  step closer to your souls vision. Make that commitment to take that action.
Your Inner Goal: What is  action you can take or  thought you can think that will support you in having more of the feeling you desire?

X

Paintbrush in hand

When I came across some of these art pieces, it took my breathe away... this is the next level.  The new Bar.... ow goodness I'm excited. Not sure everyone else feels my enthusiasm.
Her Name is Francoise Nielly, she is a french artist.
And this is what she does...

... all of that classical imagery of South France is very alive as an experience inside of me. Maybe it is what led me to the use of fluorescent colors in my paintings.

Her vibrant, illuminating works regularly span six feet in length, a size that gives her work a captivating quality.  These portraits capture the beauty and emotion of a range of faces, showing the colorful variety of the human spirit.  

I think a few more smaller paintings and will explore into a wide screen painting size

This is my favourite piece x



A shAde of Pink

The right shade of pink can transform your look- pink carnation *

Extreme differences in shades of pink looks very summery and fresh. Highlight pink- Pink Flambe*

I am deff going to look for a hot pair of pink skinnies- so fun.-Phlox Pink

A no- no red and pink- but as my mom says" you gotta clash to match" -Rose Violet

Very Nice! Fandango Pink x

Deal with S-T-R-E-S-S

For those who deal with stress, which is like saying for those who breathe...
Here are some great ways to deal with daily stress.
Also a lil dedication to the girl in my office who's voice is climbing by the minute!
Stress is a direct relation to how out of control we feel- and yet we sometimes aim to feel out of control after a very long week. When we need to grip onto the chair and say- Stress- its not you its me-no swap that! and i don't want to be friends- I don't like you all that much anyway- lets call it a day and breakup? <3 Kerri

1... *BREATHE*



§  Increased tension results in rapid, shallow breathing. For better relaxation, inhale slowly, hold your breath, and exhale slowly. Count to 8 during each phase.

2...* Sing *

Loud singing demands deep breathing, which relaxes the singer. Hold the notes for as long as you can. When I was younger, I would sing in the bath, now I make very important life decisions in there. Might swap back.

The world's top 10 Splash Hits1. Queen – Bohemian Rhapsody
2. Cheryl Cole – Fight for this love
3. The Black Eyed Peas – I gotta feeling
4. Stevie Wonder – I just called to say I love you
5. Alexandra Burke – Bad boys
6. Elton John – Candle in the wind
7. Wet Wet Wet – Love is all around
8. The Black Eyed Peas – Meet me half way
9. The Beatles – She loves you
10. Michael Buble – Haven’t met you yet

3...*Choose*

This here can be quite the challenge...try keep quiet when you feel a negative reaction. Choose to silence your phone at night ****



4... * Mental break *

Take a quick "mental break" by envisioning a favorite place in your mind-whether it be the ocean, the mountains, or your own backyard. Concentrate on "seeing", "smelling" and "hearing" the things you imagine.



5... * Draw *

Take your shoes off and draw a zebra. Just do it.



6...* Streeeeeeeetch *

Standard stretching exercises are good for relieving tension. Eating right and regular exercise always helps- try a little yoga and feel the difference.



7... *  More you *

What's fun for you can be good for you. Whatever your interests are, indulge them. Feeling competent and in control is relaxing. Be cheerful, it deflates others stress and anxiety. Laugh and smile more.

Reduce the urge to be "perfect" Avoid excessive competition Reduce criticism of yourself and others.

*Feel Stress Free*

* Birthday Wishes *

Veels geluk met jou verjaarsdag Beni!

X

Happy Sparkle Birthday * * ** *** * *

A post to Miss Make-Believe

Have the best Sparkly Birthday ***

xxx

Kerri-Berri

1 liner

A 1 liner...

The end.

Magic in the Paper

Origami! from ori meaning "folding", and kami meaning "paper" it is the traditional Japanese art of paper folding. It has evolved into a modern art form.
The goal of this art is to transform a flat sheet of material into a finished sculpture through folding and sculpting techniques, and as such the use of cuts or glue are not considered to be origami.
There are so many fun objects you can fold your paper into... here are some gorgeous pic's.

So simple and beautiful in the sun light.

I think this one is for the pro's who also have tiny hands.

Cuuutie!

An art piece

A bouquet

So Pretty

The crane is a traditional origami model which has been folded for hundreds of years. The crane stands for long life and good luck, and some people think that if you fold 1000 cranes you will be granted a wish!

Using different printed paper makes it exciting.



Wish On a Star

Origami stars have a long tradition in Asian cultures.

They bring good luck when you make them and when you give them away. Making them is fun – and addictive! They're also an opportunity to become aware of, focus on, and share your hopes and dreams.

Sending 1 star is believed to symbolize love.

Building a star is a great way to start off as a beginner.

Try here...

http://www.origamiway.com/origami-star.shtml

This was my Origami Play time

:)

the end

*Giggles*

This made my day, no my week!

Its funny coz its true

And I would like to make this clear to Wendy, I finish my cupcakes dammit!!

For my Jen x

For the convo we had in Greenside Boo. peace

Tee hee hee x

    

Biznatches

Pretty like ur dress x

And my gunstelling.

The end.